When most women decide it’s time for a divorce, their first stop is a matrimonial lawyer’s office…or at least cocktails with a trusted girlfriend for much-needed moral support. Me, I headed straight to the lingerie department.
Before you jump to any conclusions, I should explain: I wasn’t shopping for underpinings for a hot affair, or even just trying to distract myself from a painful situation. After over a decade of wearing the bland underwear my soon-to-be-ex-husband preferred, it was simply time for the ultimate statement of separation: a lacy, ornate, admittedly sexy bra and panty set, preferably in an extra-assertive shade of red.
When I first started dating my now ex, his taste in underwear — the plainest white cotton panties and no bra, which wasn’t too much of a problem for little ole 32 B me — were a surprise and a disappointment. But gradually, I shoved my beloved lace goodies — the ones that the boyfriend before him, my soulmate in retrospect, adored — towards the back of my lingerie drawer and tried to focus on all the money I was saving by walking past the Agent Provocateur boutique instead of indulging.
But, like so many marriages, things gradually unravelled, and it was time to end things and move on. Which, for me, included chucking all those boring underpants in the garbage — so liberating! — and investing in a new wardrobe of fabulously feminine lingerie.
On that first shopping visit, I walked to Bloomingdales and spent a wonderfully indulgent Saturday morning figuring out what to buy. I left with a gorgeous (and splurgy…but, hey, I hadn’t bought this stuff for years) red lace La Perla bra and panty set, and a super-lacy Chantelle black underwire balconette. And — surprise, surprise — there have been many, many shopping trips since…always to pick up the prettiest, most intricate pieces I can find. Unlike the old braless days, putting these things on each morning has come to define my life post-divorce, eliciting a little empowered smile every time I get dressed.
I guess sexy lingerie is, for many women, a special treat reserved for date night. But for me it’s the opposite: it’s become a daily staple that makes me stand up straighter and feel more confident, like a great pair of Louboutins or the perfect haircut. Which makes the high price tag on that crimson La Perla set seem worth every single penny.
Tags: divorce, La Perla, liberating, lingerie, women